Being raised in a Red State

I was listening to npr yesterday, as I regularly do, and was fascinated by a discussion on Talk of America about the difference in family values in the red states and blue states. Naomi Cahn and June Carbone explain this apparent paradox in their book, Red Families V. Blue Families. I have not read it yet, but plan to. Here's a short excerpt from the conversation on npr yesterday:
"Many of our assumptions about the cultural divide between red and blue states may be wrong. New research shows that more liberal states, like Massachusetts, tend to have the lowest rates of divorce and teen childbirth. In other words the most stable families, the homes with two parents to nurture their kids, are found in the liberal strongholds along the East and West Coasts. Conversely, the higher rates of teen childbirth and divorce occur in the red states that conservatives so often celebrate as the heartland of family values."

This led me to think about the culture of the state that I have resided my entire life and the way it has shaped my values and beliefs. Red states, such as Oklahoma, tout themselves as protectors of family values, and as crusaders for God. I myself believed this notion for a large portion of my life. In fact, it has only been in the last couple years that I have started to really question the sanity of some of the beliefs I was spoon fed from my culture since birth.

To begin with, let's talk about the disconnect this state has with reproductive issues. Follow me here. Abstinence only education is taught regularly in most homes, schools, and churches. Not only abstinence now, but abstinence til marriage. (It's no wonder people here get married so young) No discussion of contraceptives takes place in any form of institutional setting for most young people and from my experiences, very little education of this type takes place in the home either. Does this lead to a decreased rate of teen sex: NO. Is the teen birthrate lower in this state as a result: NO.

Okay, fast forward to the teenagers who end up pregnant as a result of bad sex education and are then faced with the decision of whether they want to have the baby or not. The culture in a red state does not lend itself to a teen mother choosing anything but having the child. If for some reason a female decides that she does want to have an abortion, the state legislature has made sure that she will have to face every form of barrier before this can occur: harassment, guilt, unneeded and harmful medical procedures, waiting periods, exorbitant costs, etc. In fact, a woman can only have an abortion in 3 counties in Oklahoma: 3 out of 77.
But 75% of teen pregnancies in Oklahoma end in live birth, and this statistic is similar in most red states. So for most pregnant teen females, they're choice is to have a baby that the state and culture seems to want so badly to come into existence. Surely then, this culture and this state who has failed to educate teens in methods of avoiding this situation, and has failed to give them access to all choices after the fact will then be sure to go to great lengths to support this teen mom and new baby that chose life, right? NO. This state makes sure that welfare is an impossibility to gain access to (look it up), that Medicaid is cut to bare bone levels, and that anyone on these services feels guilty for taking taxpayer services. But what about the churches, surely these institutions are making sure to take care of their own, right? From what I've seen, NO. I have never seen a church support a teen mother, because that might send the wrong message.

I am not taking a stance on abortion here believe it or not. I am trying to make a point that there is a large disconnect in our culture in red states that is very disheartening. Somewhere there needs to be a change if we want to be able to tout family values without speaking in bold faced lies.


-If you would like to listen to the npr story, here is the link: http://www.npr.org/templates/story/story.php?storyId=126780035